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Paper Cuts

Ashka

Trigger warning:

Self-harm


There are no saturated flowers here

No sight of rainbows for sore eyes

No coloured skies


Paper cuts don’t hurt anymore

And blades aren’t scary

Perhaps I’m too familiar with the lines it makes

Red then black

Carving my very existence into my skin

Swiftly

Painful but its elating to me


The back of my arms look like I just met a cat

A startled one of course

It’s my fault though

I tried to hold it


There are no demons in my mind

It’s not loud anymore

Haply its cooled down

Now that I've given myself up

I wish there were demons though

At least I could tell you what’s wrong


‘It’s flooding here

I see fleeting moments

Laminated carefully between two pieces of plastic’ she used to say

‘Pictures are quite delicate’ for her pictures were something to hold on to

‘Protect them’


This was years ago

When we were a little too naive

When we cared

Its hard feeling these days

To know what’s going on

You could call her an anchor

She was my anchor


But I’m fine now

Or at least I’d like to think this way

I just wish I told her

That she would be fine

I just wish that someone told her

That she would be fine

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